At the very heart of belonging is spirituality—the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us—rooted in love and compassion…
At the very heart of belonging is spirituality—the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us—rooted in love and compassion…
Brené Brown
Connected to Each Other
Topic: Spiritual Growth & Practice
Well, when I started looking into belonging, and I started really wanting to understand the bones of belonging—what does it mean? How do we, from a researcher’s perspective—and probably my own personal armor, really—is: What are the data here? What exactly is happening here? And I think the first thing that was surprising to me is that at the very heart of belonging is spirituality—not religion, not dogma, but spirituality, and a very important, specific tenet of spirituality, which I believe cuts across faith and denomination and belief system. And by “spirituality” I mean the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us. And that thing that is greater than us is rooted in love and compassion—that there’s something bigger than us and that we are connected to each other in a way that cannot be severed.
Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston, where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work. Additionally, she serves as a visiting professor in management at The University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business. Brown's academic roles are extensions of her deeper mission to explore the themes of courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. Her research is not just data and theories; it's an invitation to engage with the very elements that make us human.
Brown has spent two decades contributing to our understanding of emotional and social dynamics through her research and writing. She is the author of five books that have risen to the top of the New York Times bestseller list: "The Gifts of Imperfection," "Daring Greatly," "Rising Strong," "Braving the Wilderness," and "Dare to Lead." These works offer pragmatic insights into the nature of human connection. They encourage the reader to embrace their own vulnerabilities, pointing out that it's often in these spaces of uncertainty and risk that we discover our capacity for love and belonging.
Beyond the page, Brown expands her reach through various platforms. Her TED talk, "The Power of Vulnerability," has been viewed more than 50 million times worldwide. She also hosts two podcasts, "Unlocking Us" and "Dare to Lead," providing a space for ongoing discussions about the complexities of the human experience. In 2019, she broke new ground with her Netflix special, "The Call to Courage," becoming the first researcher to present a filmed lecture on the streaming service. Through all these avenues, Brown underscores the need for a heart-centered approach to life, one that makes room for both the challenges and the beauty of our shared human journey.
Braving the Wilderness
Brown, Brené. “Dr. Brené Brown - Strong Back, Soft Front, Wild Heart.” Edited by Krista Tippett, On Being with Krista Tippett, The On Being Project, On Being Studios, onbeing.org/programs/brene-brown-strong-back-soft-front-wild-heart-feb2018/.
Brené Brown
Theme: Spiritual Growth
About This Brené Brown Quotation [Commentary]
Brené Brown begins by making a clear distinction: “not religion, not dogma, but spirituality.” As she looks for “the bones of belonging,” she finds that “at the very heart of belonging is spirituality”—“the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us.” Her words move carefully from belonging to spirituality to connection. In that movement, belonging is not first about acceptance or agreement. It begins in the recognition that we are already connected, and that this connection is “rooted in love and compassion.”
What gives this passage its force is the way Brené Brown keeps her sequence of thought intact. She starts with the question, “What are the data here? What exactly is happening here?” and then names what surprised her: that at the center of belonging there is “something greater than us.” She does not turn away from inquiry. She follows it until it opens into a deeper truth about human life. The heart of belonging, then, is not something people manufacture for themselves. It rests in a connection “that cannot be severed,” even when fear, distance, or difference make that hard to remember.
Brené Brown also makes clear what kind of connection she means. It is not rooted in sameness, and not limited by “faith and denomination and belief system.” It is rooted in “love and compassion.” That language keeps the quotation grounded and direct. Spiritual Growth, in this light, is the deepening awareness that we are “inextricably connected to each other” by something greater than the separate self. Her words bring belonging back to what is most basic and most demanding: to live as though this connection is real, and to let love and compassion shape how we meet one another.
Brené Brown on Belonging and Spirituality [Quotations]
“Well, when I started looking into belonging, and I started really wanting to understand the bones of belonging—what does it mean? How do we, from a researcher’s perspective—and probably my own personal armor, really—is: What are the data here? What exactly is happening here? And I think the first thing that was surprising to me is that at the very heart of belonging is spirituality—not religion, not dogma, but spirituality, and a very important, specific tenet of spirituality, which I believe cuts across faith and denomination and belief system. And by “spirituality” I mean the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us. And that thing that is greater than us is rooted in love and compassion—that there’s something bigger than us and that we are connected to each other in a way that cannot be severed.”
“And so when I started to look at belonging, what I realized is that it is a spiritual practice, and it’s the spiritual practice of believing in ourselves and belonging to ourselves so fully that we find what’s sacred in not only being a part of something, like our DNA calls us to be, but also, we find sacred the need, on occasion, to stand alone in our values, in our beliefs, when we’re called to do that, as well. And so, to me, this idea of true belonging is a type of belonging that never requires us to be inauthentic or change who we are, but a type of belonging that demands who we are — that we be who we are — even when we jeopardize connection with other people, even when we have to say, “I disagree. That’s not funny. I’m not on board.””
—Brené Brown [Strong Back, Soft Front, Wild Heart—On Being with Krista Tippett].
“I recorded an audio program for Sounds True titled, Rising Strong as a Spiritual Practice. Spirituality emerged as an important theme in the data I collected for Rising Strong…
“Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning, and purpose to our lives.”
This definition was first published in The Gifts of Imperfection. For some people, that power greater than us is God; for others, it’s fishing. Some are reminded of our inextricable connection by faith; others by expressions of shared humanity. Some find that religion is the best expression of inextricable human connection that is guided by love and compassion, and others believe that no entity has done more to corrode that connection than organized religion.
While diverse in practice, the definition of spirituality and the importance of it to the concepts of wholeheartedness and rising strong has withstood the test of new data. In Grounded Theory, a theory is only as good as its ability to work new data. This one has stood the test of time and emerged again as an important variable in the research on true belonging that I write about in Braving the Wilderness.”
—Brené Brown [Defining Spirituality—brenebrown.com (March 27, 2018)].
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