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The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

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The Ultimate Lesson

Topic: Divine Love & Goodness

The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was born in Switzerland on July 8, 1926, and her life journey took her from the heart of Europe to the intricate corridors of the human psyche. A groundbreaking psychiatrist, she is best known for her pioneering work in Near-death studies and her seminal book "On Death and Dying," published in 1969. In this work, she courageously broached the subject of mortality, delineating what would later be known as the Kübler-Ross model or the Five Stages of Grief. These stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—were initially described as phases individuals go through when grappling with their own impending death. Over time, however, these stages have also been recognized as universally relevant to anyone dealing with loss or grief, expanding our understanding of the shared human experience of love and suffering.

More than an academic, Kübler-Ross was a tireless educator and humanitarian. She received twenty honorary degrees and estimated that she had educated around 125,000 students through her courses on death and dying across various institutions. Notably, she was also a 2007 inductee into the National Women's Hall of Fame. Her voice reached far beyond the medical and psychiatric communities; in 1970, she delivered the prestigious Ingersoll Lectures on Human Immortality at Harvard University, casting a spotlight on the theme of On Death and Dying. The breadth of her influence attests to the universality of her message, one that transcends academic disciplines and speaks to the heart of our collective human journey.

While she was often dubbed the "death and dying lady," she considered herself more aptly as the "life and living lady." The Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, inspired by her life's work, continues her mission. The foundation serves as a vivid reminder that her teachings were not solely about the end of life but about embracing the totality of existence—both its trials and its joys. It is this enduring focus on love, acceptance, and the interconnectedness of all life's experiences that makes her legacy a living testament to the transformative power of compassion.

(1926-2004) Humanism, Arts and Sciences

Kübler-Ross, Elisabeth. "Death: The Final Stage of Growth," p. 76

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross


Theme: Divine Love

About This Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Quote [Brief Commentary]

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross states the matter simply: “The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.” By calling it “the ultimate lesson,” she places love at the center of life rather than at its margins. This is not one lesson among many. It is the lesson that gives shape to the rest. And because she says “all of us have to learn,” her words include everyone. In light of Divine Love, she points to a love that is not narrow, selective, or earned.

The sentence becomes even clearer in its next movement: “which includes not only others but ourselves as well.” Elisabeth Kübler-Ross does not separate love of others from love of self. She keeps them together. Many people are ready to offer care, patience, and forgiveness to others while denying that same mercy to themselves. Her words correct that imbalance. “Unconditional love” cannot be whole if it leaves out “ourselves as well.”

She also says that “all of us have to learn” this love. That keeps the quotation grounded in practice. Unconditional love is not automatic. It is learned across a lifetime, through how we live, how we suffer, how we forgive, and how we receive care. The sequence of her words is exact: “the ultimate lesson,” then “unconditional love,” then its full reach—“not only others but ourselves as well.” In that brief order, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross gives both comfort and instruction: we are here to learn a love wide enough to include the whole person.

The Ultimate Lesson—Elisabeth Kübler-Ross [Excerpted Commentary]

The sole purpose of life is to grow. The ultimate lesson is learning how to love and be loved unconditionally… I truly believe that my truth is a universal one—above all religions, economics, race and color—shared by the common experience of life. All people come from the same source and return to the same source. We must all learn to love and be loved unconditionally… [See Resources for the link to this Awakin.org article.]

Additional Kübler-Ross Quotes

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle… and have found their way out of the depths.”

—Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, Death: The Final Stage of Growth, p. 76.

“When we have passed the tests we are sent to Earth to learn, we are allowed to graduate. We are allowed to shed our body, which imprisons our souls.”

―Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross,The Wheel of Life (1997).

Resources

  • The Hardest Lesson, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross on Awakin.org

Related Quotes

  • In Your Midst - Hildegard of Bingen, In Your Midst
  • God Is Love - Apostle John, The Gospel of John
  • For All This - Gerard Manley Hopkins, God's Grandeur
  • Life of Divine Essence - Hildegard of Bingen, Book of Divine Works
  • The Ultimate Lesson - Elisabeth Kübler-Ross,
  • She Loved Much - Harriet Beecher Stowe,
  • Only with the Heart - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince
  • Awakens Your Love - Saint Teresa of Avila, The Interior Castle
  • The Love That Will Not Die - Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart
  • Love Alone - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, The Phenomenon of Man
  • Unconditional Love - Elisabeth Kübler-Ross,
  • Redemptive Love - Martin Luther King Jr., Strength To Love
  • Love Is Powerful - Brené Brown, The Gifts of Perfection
  • Spiritual and Positive - ʻAbdu'l-Bahá, Paris Talks

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